behind enemy lines

this is my angsty poem. i feel this way every couple of months. Most of you probably dont get it, but thats ok. Dedicated to Loraina, the sister who gets it.

Are you my enemy?
I'ts hard to say
When at the end you wouldn't give me the time of day

Were you hurting, or just holding a grudge?
Or making me wade through the unknown and trudge....
Through your silence and stone features, that used to be so warm

Did you lose your brightness for the world?
Or just for me?

My pain somehow became irrelevant
And support for me became ambivalent
But what is the world, if anything but fair
Confining me in a row surrounded by empty chairs

Patience, love, understanding being kept
Only for the boy who continually wept
So sad, So sorry, So unfortunate
"You'll end up happier by far", they placed their bets

Faults, offenses? Threw them out the window
What won't sway the audience is what they don't know
" Come to this side" , you said "watch me cry my tears"
"Watch me suffer endlessly for years"

" At the hands of a woman so cold and unfeeling"
" Did I mention she wasn't good enough? Even while pleading and kneeling?"

"What a horrible woman, with my best interest at heart"
" Always trying to help and having affection like art"

"I'm not sure what happened" he says
"Did she drown in the mud?"
"I only dragged her as long as I could"

"Somehow she escaped my sharp, suffocating grip"
"How wrong and how selfish could she get?"

Now perhaps it's clearer to your demented self
Your suffering is empty , up on a dusty old shelf

You took all you could until your hand hit the bottom
Now lets move on before we see another autumn

Snatch up your greedy hand, and fold it neatly in your lap
Put on a happy face, move on, because I'm never coming back.

Hard as Life

This poem is called "Hard as Life". I wrote it a little while back. It is just about the struggles and hardships of life, although they come in all shapes in sizes, everyone has them. I hope this can reach out to people and maybe give them strength while accepting and working through their hardships.

Hard as sticks
Hard as stones
Hard enough to break my bones


Hard as questions without answers
Hard as losing all that matters


Hard as driving an unpaved road
Hard as being stuck in automatic mode


Hard as aging and growing old
Hard as dying with no story told


Hard as wandering in the dark
Hard as trying to leave a mark


Hard as trying to be heard
Hard as wandering what you've learned


Hard as the words left unspoken
Hard as the tender hearts that are broken


Hard as the dreams stopped in their tracks
Hard as leaving and not turning back


Hard as the harvest that always failed
Hard as a train that becomes derailed


Hard as standing in front of a crowd
Hard as expressing true feelings out loud


Hard as navigating an unmarked trail
Hard as bringing color to something so pale


Hard as knowing beginning from end
Hard as recognizing enemy from friend


Hard as getting from day to day
Hard as never ceasing to pray


Hard as accepting the unfairness of life
Hard as enduring through endless strife


Hard as staying on the right path
Hard as constantly avoiding the worlds wrath


But no matter life's trials
Or how bitter the cup
Hard as life is, I'll never give up

Brother

This poem is for my best friend who passed away last summer. It was a hard time, for alot of complicated reasons. Those who know me best might understand this better, but hopefully anyone who has lost someone they love can relate.

As my tears fall on this page
They remind me of the man you are
Swept away to a safer place
Miles away, but really not far


Brother, Friend, for you I have wept
But I must be willing to accept
Our paths conjoined, for but a time
But now the path I tread is mine


Sometimes feeling your not near
Sometimes wondering if you hear
The prayers and love I send to you
Before you left, I wish you knew


What you meant , and what you've done
How your song didn't go unsung
Your example, your light shone through
All the darkness the world construed


You endured more than most could bear
Never faltering to show love and care
Where are you now my brother, my friend? 
Your'e in the world that hath no end


Although our time was short and sweet
I know one day again we will meet
And pick up where our journey came to and end
And then eternally make a mends


I miss you brother, please pass by me often
Help me to always have a heart that softens
Just like you taught me when you were here
When you were always close and near


I love you brother, I love you friend
I know your story in eternity will never end


Somehow with you gone I'm less afraid
When its my turn and to earth I bid
A farewell and join you then
I know you will come for me, my brother, my friend

Like no other

This is dedicated to all mothers(especially bonnie, my momma).I'd like to think this is how a baby feels after the scare of being brought into a new world.


Darkly loomed the bleak night sky
To my pure and untainted eye
Breath of air, sharp and clean
Faces new and never seen

Cold and lost, my breath being taken
By a foreign noise I'm shaken
Comfort stolen, warmth afar off
Scared and feeling all is lost

Almost consumed by helplessness
Almost lost in this wilderness
Before giving up I opened my eyes
And saw someone I could recognize

Although I've only glimpsed her face in dreams 
I knew her voice, and her spirit I've seen
She took me up and held me tight
Then whispered away all of my fright

I knew right then she was like no other
She would always protect me, she was my mother
 

Choices

Poem Numero dos: I wrote this one today actually. I was thinking of the phrases "sink or swim" and "fight or flight" and the rest just kinda fell along with it i suppose. I hope you enjoy.


Choices


Sink or swim
Fight or flight
Waving white flags in the darkest of nights


Twists and turns
Screams and shouts
Shallow pools deep with doubts


Friend or foe
Smooth or rough
Loose and free or bound tight with cuffs


Pure or littered
Light or dim
Safe in the center or dancing the rim


Joy or sorrow
Bliss or dread
The beaten path or the path less tread


Hot or cold
Bitter or sweet
Fighting or claiming a useless feat


In or out
Open or shut
Solid ground or stuck in a rut


Rain or sun
Humble or proud
Standing alone or amongst the crowd


Long or short
Sharp or dull
Up in the masts or down in the hull


Dreamer or dozer
Brighter or dimmer
A good loser or a bad winner


Stronger or weaker
Saint or sinner
A selfish taker or a selfless giver


Wicked or righteous
Build or break
Stand firm or tremble and quake


Fear or courage
Hope or despair
Holding your breathe or welcoming air


Drop or pick up
Climb or descend
Making an enemy or making a friend


Joy or sorrow
Rise or fall
Weakness or Strength
Every choice is our call




~HSH

Here goes nothing

As I said in my profile, I've decided to start sharing my poems with the public. Although this scares the bejeezus(sp? haha) out of me, I thought it was time I opened this part of me up. Ive been writing poems and songs for years and years, so some you will see will be years old and some will be brand new. Ill probably post some background information on some. I hope you all like them and can connect with them and find meaning in them. here goes number 1:

I never made a title for this one, Im still working on that, but here is one I wrote a while back.

I need to give it up
Learn to give it all
Leave it in your hands
Accept that it's your call


When times get hard
And I get weak
I collect my wants
And solutions I keep


But my answers
Aren't part of the plan
The cards aren't in my control
It's not in my hand


Bitter,confused, ready to quit
Feeling the rocks in this bottomless pit
Where can I go? Where do I turn?
Oh how quickly we forget what we've learned


Praise the mercy of him who helps us remember
Who never lets the light go out
Even when we are down to an ember


He'll never give up
He'll never forsake
He'll always follow behind in our wake


No matter how hard the road back may seem
And even if the light we see, is just a small gleam
We must turn back and give him our all
If we do, never again will we fall


But if perhaps we stumble again
He'll still be there, Always our savior and friend